First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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