what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Randomize
