I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Randomize