i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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