hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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