this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
