to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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