And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
