You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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