I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
