new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
