when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
