I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
