New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
