last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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