she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
You need a sexual gate keeper
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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