My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
