Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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