Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
