she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
