i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Randomize
