She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
