Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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