he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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