i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
