The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
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