Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
