How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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