i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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