What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
