I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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