It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
