I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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