anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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