Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
