I want to have your abortion
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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