You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
