Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
