I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
this will be a night to untag.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
