their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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