She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
