I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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