I think I am morally bankrupt
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize