Im at strip club and am horny
Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
