fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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