Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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