what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i barfeds in our rink
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Randomize
