no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
