so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
We have started to decorate penises.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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