Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
